The Key to a Successful Relationship: Self-Love

Key & Heart

The following is an article that was published in Lady Pens years ago. It is very fitting because Valentines Day is right around the corner. I also have an upcoming free class on this very topic, the information is at the bottom of the blog.

Are you wondering how could self-love be so important in a relationship between two people?  I will answer that question with another question, how can you love anyone if you cannot love yourself? The answer is you cannot. A great analogy is a stewardess on an airplane will always tell you that when the plane is going down, if the cabin is running low on oxygen, to always give yourself the oxygen first before giving it to an infant. If you give it to the infant first, you could pass out from lack of oxygen, and then both of you are goners. The same is true in a relationship; fill yourself up with self-love first, and then you have plenty of love to give to your lucky partner.

So what is self-love?  It is not that egotist, self centered, conceited love that unfortunately some people have. These people put their own selfish needs first even when it hurts others.  Self-love is when you respect yourself enough that you stay out of harmful situations, get your needs met while avoiding hurting others, and take care of your body, mind, and spirit. How do you cultivate self-love? The following are tips to create self-love in your life:

1. Stop pretending to be someone you are not to impress and/or please someone else. How would you feel if someone you were falling in love with turned out to be an imposter?

2. Be yourself always; if you do not know who you are, then take the journey of self discovery.  It takes a lifetime to answer the question “Who Am I?”

3. Do activities that you enjoy: swimming, walking, reading, socializing, taking classes, volunteering, etc.

4. The qualities that you desire in a mate, cultivate those same qualities in yourself.

5. Always see the glass as half full instead of half empty and surround yourself around positive people.

The more you practice the above five suggestions, the more you will love yourself.  The more you love yourself, the higher quality people you will attract into your life. The higher quality people that are in your life, the easier it is for “The One” to come into your life.

The first class on Self-Love is available free Tuesday 2/12/13 8pm ET on the Spiritual Learning Connection on Blogtalk Radio at the following link–pamela-cummins


The balance of the Ready For Love program will be Five Thursdays beginning February 21st at 8pm ET. For more information



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s